Abbie Elian had been suffering through an exhausting cycle of infections, pain and fatigue for five months when nurses suggested her IUD could be the cause.
She’d had the contraceptive device — often referred to as a coil — inserted for six years and, while she’d struggled with hormonal imbalances and heavy cycles, the multiple UTIs, yeast infections, sharp pelvic cramps and even kidney stones, were all new.
The decision was made to remove it, but doctors were stunned by the ‘horrifying’ hairball that came out attached to the device, almost half its size.
‘When the doctor took it out, they called it a hairball. I didn’t touch it. We don’t think it’s just hair. We think it’s probably tampon fragments, maybe toilet paper fragments, my hair from my head,’ Abbie, 29, from San Diego, California, says.
She’d done over 20 Telehealth visits (online appointments in the US), where she was prescribed antibiotics, but couldn’t get an in-person appointment until four months after her symptoms began.
When she finally attended an in-person gynaecology appointment, the healthcare professional said the issue wasn’t related to the contraceptive device.
The doctor said: ‘You don’t need the IUD out unless you’re trying to conceive.’
Abbie felt her discomfort wasn’t addressed at the appointment, and she was instead told to have an ultrasound. ‘The pain I was experiencing felt like a stabbing pain in my lower pelvis region and got worse depending on hormonal factors and activities,’ she adds.
‘When I saw it, I completely froze’
With no abnormalities on her ultrasound, Abbie made the decision to have her IUD removed two weeks later, after ending up in hospital for kidney stones.
When she saw the hairball attached to the device as it was removed, she was ‘horrified’.
‘When they took it out and I saw it, I completely froze,’ she says. ‘I was so in shock and trying to piece together what the ball was and how it could’ve gotten there.
‘As strange as it sounds, I was relieved when I saw the hairball because it validated my instinct that something was wrong and I could finally begin feeling normal again.’
Her fiancé compared the hairball to seeing a ‘gerbil’ removed from his partner, in good humour, but at the time Abbie felt extremely self-conscious.
‘My partner saw it coming out of me. I was mortified,’ she adds. Although her partner reassured her he never felt put off by it.
She wasn’t left with many answers from doctors, though, but they’ve theorised that her IUD strings may have been too long and picked up the debris.
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‘A very traumatising experience’
For Abbie, this ‘traumatising’ experience has meant she struggled with intimacy in the months after.
‘If I’m being completely vulnerable, I felt so out of touch with my body,’ she says. ‘A part of me that’s supposed to bring me pleasure and connection brought me confusion, embarrassment, and pain.
‘It took me months to even be willing to try anything and when I did, it often resulted in me breaking down crying.
‘I already have plenty of insecurities and issues with my own body. This was just the icing on the cake and made nothing easier.’
She believes she wouldn’t have gotten through any of her ordeal without her partner.
‘I can’t stress enough how much the partner you choose in your life matters,’ Abbie adds. ‘I wouldn’t have had the courage to go to those appointments or the emergency room without him. We are here to support and encourage one another without judgement or embarrassment.’
She still experiences some hormonal pain but, since having the hairball removed, she feels like ‘a different person’.
TikToker Abbie took a break from birth control for eight months after having the IUD taken out, and has realised that, while it works for many women, hormonal birth control isn’t something she wants to start using again.
‘I’ve decided birth control doesn’t sit well with my body and I’m grateful to have a partner that is incredibly supportive and actually talked me out of being on it all together,’ she explains. ‘I’ve started cycle tracking, and we both want to allow my body to heal.’
After sharing her story on TikTok and hitting nearly eight million views, Abbie wants to normalise sharing experiences of womanhood, no matter how vulnerable they may make us feel.
‘I’m determined to make my socials a safe space for women to feel comfortable being vulnerable about their experiences,’ she adds. ‘I’m normalising sharing what others may keep to themselves – relationships, hairballs, and everything in-between.
‘My goal isn’t to scare anyone out of these decisions, what my experience was isn’t bound to be yours. My goal is to just spread awareness.’