We’re often told slow and steady wins the race, but in the bedroom this little-known sex act could really get you to the finish line.
You may not have heard of ‘outstroking’, but it’s fairly likely you’ve practiced it without realising.
In short, it involves slowly removing a penis or sex toy from the vagina or bottom, a motion 57% of women say they find ‘extra pleasurable’.
Sex education site OMGYES, surveyed 20,000 women, finding penetration toys (or a penis) can feel especially good on the way out of an orifice.
It’s an ‘excellent practice’ according to sex educator Gigi Engle, who tells Metro everyone should be doing it in bed.
‘We should be removing objects from our bodies slowly regardless,’ she explains. ‘But people do it a lot of the time without realising because rapid removal of a toy from the vagina or anus can be painful, outstroking is a great technique for keeping things comfortable.’
Why can outstroking feel so good?
‘The slow removal can feel quite good against the erectile tissue in the vagina (which engorges with blood during arousal),’ Gigi explains.
‘It’s especially great for anal play because the slow removal of a toy, especially anal beads, at the time of orgasm can really heighten the sensation, since it’s specifically designed to ignite the anal nerves in the rectal opening.’
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Some women told OMGYES why they’re such a fan of outstroking, with one lady explaining: ‘I enjoy that feeling of a gentle stretch at the first inch of my vagina. A toy with ripples allows that to happen a few times in close succession.’
Another woman said once the toy or penis was finally removed, she enjoyed the sensation of ‘gaping open, then shut’ which mimics orgasm for her.
Top tips
Experts at OMGYES have some suggestions when practicing outstroking, too…
The element of surprise: Love not knowing when that next pop will happen? Try an anal toy with beads of different widths that are randomly placed, rather than arranged by size. Or, add surprise by getting a partner to do the tugging.
The Grayson Silicone Anal Beads from sextoys.co.uk, or the Silicone Anal Tear Drop beads could be a great starting point for giving this sex act a whirl.
Keeping all that up there: If you’re not used to using anal beads, using patience and lots of lube, go one bead or bump at a time, and stop if there’s pain.
Timing the outstroke: Many women prefer to save outstroking for later in a session, when the body is warmed up. A popular time is right on the horizon of orgasm. Pulling the toy out can push the body over the edge and intensify the climax.
For vaginal outstroking, the Ridge vibrator from sextoys.co.uk could provide extra pleasure.
Keeping things clean: If a toy has entered a butt, any butt, it must be washed thoroughly with soap and warm water before it goes inside a vagina.
One lady who enjoys slowly removing anal beads from her bottom, adds: ‘I love the unpredictability of when the bead will pop out. They say you can’t surprise yourself, but with beads I can.’
But it’s not just women who benefit from this. For men, they can have an equally pleasurable experience with outstroking according to Gigi, because ‘as a cis man, having something removed from your anus slowly it does the same thing as it does for a woman’.
‘Also, when we’re talking about removing the penis slowly, there’s an element of control, and it can be an erotic play in that way,’ she explains.
Enhancing outstroking
If you want to make outstroking extra sexy with a partner, Gigi, author of Kink Curious, suggests leaning into the anticipation surrounding the act.
‘This is very sexy because when we’re talking about the slow insertion or slow removal, it’s very anticipatory, which is linked to the arousal process in our brain.
‘The excitement of something that’s about to happen can be a turn on.’
If you’re looking to take it a step further, the expert suggests using your words.
‘Communication is key, it can be very sexy if you use dirty talk to tell your partner “I’m going to slowly ease out of you, doesn’t that feel good” or “I have control of your body”.’
So there you go, slow and steady really does win.
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